If we are not already the laughing stock of the world then we are rapidly approaching the point where any sane person will just start guffawing at the mention of “Australia”, and use very rude insulting words to describe us, as the Covid Mania here is just so embarrassing.
For some reason (probably because he has some racist conception of Chinamen as being sneaky and devious and is worried they will snatch our Grand Slam) the Victorian lunatic Dan Andrews decided that the Australian Open tennis tournament would go ahead in very isolated Melbourne, despite the fact that it meant around 1200 possibly plague ridden foreigners had to come here to hit the balls around, or help the people who hit the balls around.
Some of them it turned out on arrival did have the Black Death, and so many players have been complaining about the two week confinement they must endure, that it is preventing them from practising hitting the balls. If they don’t hit the balls they may just forget how to hit the balls, and then the tournament will be ruined because none of them can remember how to hit the balls. These balls, they need to be hit, and properly.
Also in quarantine (cost=$40 million, est.) their obnoxious OnlyFans whore girlfriends, like Vanessa Sierra, can’t get their hair washed (1:15):
The tone of the coverage down under… #AusOpenpic.twitter.com/vDrHKaGw2K
— Ben Rothenberg (@BenRothenberg) January 18, 2021
Now we learn there is a mouse problem as well:
it’s actually a lot of them! Not even 1 in my room now🤦🏼♀️ pic.twitter.com/uUaicOhoB5
— Yulia Putintseva (@PutintsevaYulia) January 19, 2021
The plot thickens though, Police Minister Lisa Neville, accuses someone – without the naming and shaming that all Karens demand – of feeding the mouse, who is possibly named Scratchy. What do these, inevitably eastern European, tennis bores expect? If you feed Scratchy he will just come back for more! The press fills us in on some of the important details:
Neville did not name the tennis star specifically but indicated the government suspects some people may have been feeding the mouse [Scratchy]. She said:
“As I understand there may have been some feeding going on”
In case it needs spelling out, we have a government minister worried about people feeding mice in their rooms. Perhaps we need a formal enquiry into the mice feeding issue. Not a Royal Commission maybe, just a normal enquiry.
In other Branch Covidian news – “Australia border closures and COVID-19: We risk becoming a hermit kingdom“, link, we learn that it is unlikely we will be allowed to leave our prison island until at least next year, which also means no foreigners can come here, unless they are professional fluffy ball hitters.
Even Australian citizens find it hard to come here presently, and many have been waiting many months to be able to do so, but the daily arrivals are capped at a low number (unless ball hitters are coming), and it’s extremely expensive when factoring in getting the required Covid69 tests, the bloated flight prices, and the thousands of dollars needed for compulsory 2 week quarantine.
Plus we have internally displaced persons, people from Victoria who got stuck in New South Wales at the wrong time, and now are not allowed to cross the border back into Victoria, because they might have the plague, and they would kill everyone in Victoria with the plague they may have, even if none of them is actually sick.
A lot of us really are just phaggots and pussies for putting up with all this utter lunacy. It’s not going to end unless the state premiers start to worry that it’s all going to cause electoral problems, and currently it is the opposite of that, because so many have been completely brainwashed by the media.
In any case, here is Maria Sharapova, the only eastern European tennis bore that we like, being of a healthy weight and good proportions, and beautiful, even with the pout:
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